Friday, June 7, 2013

Changing the tune

Recently I've been faced with the most difficult decision as a homeschooler. Whether or not to continue giving montessori lessons. From previous posts you can tell Delores has lost interest in the lessons and I have been trying to decide if I should stop trying to introduce new activities all together or just take a break for a while. Poor Josh has put up with me talking about this almost everyday for the past week. 

This was an extremely difficult thing for me to consider because for the last 2 years my life has revolved around Montessori homeschooling. This is the only way I know how to teach. How would I give a lesson on something without a tray or a basket? How would I know what to teach without a lesson plan or an outline? The thought of doing anything besides this terrifies me. But then I remembered what other homeschoolers have told me. Children change. Learning styles change, situations change and family dynamics change. What worked for you once before may not be the best thing for you now. While that may still be hard for me to accept it is very true in our situation. 

I had to face the fact that Delores had gotten all she was going to get out of montessori. Then I had to look at what was most important for us. Yes I thought it was super awesome that she could grade colors and identify things blindfolded, but was that the most important thing I needed to teach her right now? No. I still think those things have their benefit but those things could wait. The things we wanted Delores to understand are the things we use everyday. Skills for life. Kindness, compassion, selflessness, understanding, basic math, a love for reading, a freedom to be herself, a love for God, good manners and a respect for other people. We don't need montessori lessons for that. 

Also, Josh pointed out that Montessori had consumed my life. I never wanted a classroom environment or my home to feel like a daycare and, by God, 4 years into this mommy business and that is exactly what my home feels like. I spend my weekends looking for materials, my nights making or getting lessons together and my days planning and researching. I've completely lost sight of the things I enjoy doing and of myself. After this was pointed out to me I realized that while I LOVE montessori it just wasn't for us as a full time homeschooling curriculum. I just can't devote that amount of time to something that isn't for me. It puts too much pressure on me as a mommy and I do not react well to pressure unfortunately.

Fortunatly, I feel like God has led me to another curriculum for Delores that teaches things through reading popular children's book and doing spinoff activities with the theme from the book in mind called "Moving Beyond the Page." It is for 4-5 years olds but Josh and I both decided she was ready for something more advanced and the child can sit and read the looonnngest books without tiring and retain almost everything. This week and last week we read a Dora book we picked up at the library twice a day and today she recited the whole thing to me as if she were reading the book. That is why we decided to go with this curriculum. It isn't available for purchase until July 1st, but I will keep you posted on how it is working out once we get it.

As for Lydia I haven't quite figured out what to do with her lessons. I don't think she would benefit from Delores' curriculum because it is near impossible to get the child to sit through a book and she isn't artsy so she wouldn't get much out of the activities. I still think she would benefit for montessori lessons but my issue is how do I do both at the same time?

I can't figure that out until Delores' curriculum is in my hands and I can see how it works and how much of me is really necessary in the lessons. So, until then we are just taking a break and enjoying the free time we have with one another. 

I still plan to blog periodically about what we've been doing while we are getting adjusted so keep checking back for updates. I hope by August we will be back in full swing with our homeschooling once again. 

Ps: Just for the fun of it, here are some pictures from what we've been doing lately. 

Playing

Washing a tea set

Making daddy's Father's Day gift from the girls. 

Enjoying the girl with a thousand expressions. 




Weekly highlights--6/8

This week we did absolutely no work in front of the mat. It was definitely a thinking outside of the mat kind of week for me. Delores recently flat out told me the other day that she did not like doing lessons. It broke my heart and I've been struggling with what to do with this for a while now. I could sense months ago that she just did not enjoy doing lessons but I think she keep doing them to please me. I think she would have done some lessons last week if I asked her to, but I just didn't feel like struggling with it. I am still trying to find ways to sneak in lessons were I see opportunities present themselves. Kind of like sneaking vegetables into a meal without kids knowing it. They are still benefiting from it but they don't even realize it's happening. So, here are some activities I snuck in this past week.


Transferring water with a dropper for the first time (practical life)


Lacing shapes (practical life). Even rosy was intrigued by this 

Pouring lentils between two small pitchers or, in our case, one cup measuring cups

Cutting cherries to get the seeds out

Love this face

Mostly we just spent some good quality time with one another while I tried to figure out exactly what I'm going to do with Delores' bomb she dropped on me.







Painting pottery

I have to admit I have not been very motivated to write this week. I decided last week that I was done getting frustrated with Delores about not wanting to do lessons. I'm leaving lesson time in her hands and in the meantime I'm trying to sneak in activities to fill her time with play and activities that incorporate Montessori principles. 

The first was a trip to a local pottery painting establishment, the "Color Clay Cafe," located on East North Street in Greenville. 

Delores chose a cupcake which she painted pink of course. The child is obsessed with sweets and the color pink. 

Lydia chose a little hamster which she painted different shades of blue. She saw that little hamster on the shelf and picked it up, hugged it and said "I love this mouse." That was it. I would have bought her that little hamster if it was $50.00. Thankfully it was only $9 and some change.

I really didn't expect to see any learning going on with this trip. I had only planned this trip for fun. I was surprised when I saw these faces:
That's my dead giveaway sign that there's some learning going on and to take a step back and observe. Lydia worked for a good 30 mins. Delores for a good hour. 

We were there for about an hour and a half and never felt rushed. The whole trip cost us $25.00. We went on a Wednesday which is kids day so we got the 3% studio fee for free. With all the awesome concentration going on I definitely feel like it was a good price and well worth it. 

If you are thinking of taking your kids there wait until they are 2 and 1/2 to 3 years old (I saw some stuff I'd like to paint too) and expect to play by the establishment's rules. I was a little disappointed by the amount of rules and regulations put on the children instead of just letting them do their thang. Like don't paint these colors together. Don't get it too thick. Don't do hand prints or footprints without the employees helping. Don't, don't, don't. Huff.  

But anyway here's how they turned out:

They fire it and 10 days later you can pick them up. Delores decided that this was going to be daddy's Father's Day gift. Hahaha, very thoughtful right? We'll see if it goes in our room or it ends up in her room. I thought that was a sweet gesture though.

As promised here are pictures of what they look like when we got them home
Delores has already decided the cupcake is going in her room. :)

Sunday, June 2, 2013

Conflict of interest

As a stay at home mom, taking time for yourself is one of the hardest and most needed things to accomplish. We give and give and give until we crash and burn. Then (if your like me) you throw a little hissy fit, buy something(s) you don't really need and/or go on a cleaning or cooking strike until you feel refreshed and revitalized. And the cycle starts all over again. Many of us realize this doesn't work so we take part time jobs, get a hobby, or schedule time to do something fun for ourselves. 

I have tried all three and none seem to go as smoothly as I would like. I have a ton of hobbies I start with good intentions and never finish. I worked a part time job for a year a a half and realized it wasn't for me. And who really wants to take time out of their busy day to come watch 2 rowdy kids for free while I go and have a little fun? 

Blogging has become my number 1 hobby at the moment and it is easier and has kept it's momentum for going on 3 months now. But of course, it would be since I'm writing about my kids and the activities that take up the majority of my time. 

Even still there are conflicts that keep me from writing as much as I would like to. For instance, I can't write when the girls are awake because they need me and when a thought is interrupted by a child trying to get my attention I don't always respond pleasantly. Which isn't fair to them. That leaves me 2 hours during the middle of the day during nap time.

That might be okay but I also do my cleaning during nap time. I have reminders in my phone that are set up to tell me when to clean something based on frequency. Either weekly, bi-weekly or monthly. I can't do top to bottom cleaning in one day because that just overwhelms me so it may take me 5 days to clean our 2 bathrooms. So if I have a reminder that I have to clean something I do that instead of writing. 

I also have it set up to remind me to do a budget and lesson calendar every month and to do a grocery list every 2 weeks. I don't do every week shopping. I don't have time to spend hours at the two different grocery stores I shop at every weekend. So if I have to do those things I don't write.

That leaves the hours I'm awake after the girls go to bed. Between 8:30 and 10:00 when Josh wants to go to bed. Well my brain doesn't work during those times. I veg out and can hardly make a coherent sentence let alone a whole post about something. 

But somewhere around 10:30, laying in bed, I get my second wind and my mind goes crazy with ideas. Inspiration hits and I cannot shut my brain off. Well this is just a tad annoying. I love sleep and I don't know that I've ever willingly got up before the girls unless I had something I needed to do before they got up. That's why I never have on makeup and my hair is usually a mess. I'd rather sleep than get all dolled up to impress the walls of my house, my kids or whoever I may encounter once or twice a week when I get out of the house. So when my brain starts buzzing with ideas all I can really think about is "I want to go to sleep!"

Now when I choose not to ignore my inspiration I do my best thinking and processing but I struggle to get by the next day. 

There is always a sacrifice somewhere. If you take time for yourself, your house suffers. If you work on your house, your sanity suffers. If you take time for yourself and work on the house the school work and the kids suffer. And not surprisingly I have read and heard this from many stay at home moms. 

So what do we do? Well, you can accept that your house won't be as clean as you like, that you just don't have time to do a hobby or a job, you just don't have time to prepare lessons or homeschool or any of the other variations and you move on with your life leaving those other things by the wayside. 

Or you can find a way to make it all work. If anyone has mastered how to do that without sacrificing something else, let me know, would ya?